Monday, November 12, 2018

Batar Dan

Hello.

It's been 2 years. Now that's a record. But hey, I felt the urge again to write on this blog again because it has my artist's essence ( it currently stinks now). As in, I started off my journey as an artist focusing on what I really want for me in this artistic life. A lot happened these 2 years. According to my last entry, I was telling you that I entered on a studio and my work seemed to blossom... Or so I thought. In fact, that's the time when I got tested. On how my entire career and goals can really get fucked up if you are not careful enough. How people can influence your entire career if you are not careful enough. How people can ruin almost your entire life and destroy your very essence that I tried to preserve since I was able to draw. How you can easily be detached from your art and yourself.

(Edit) well, I was about to write another entry but I noticed I left this one on the drafts. And the feeling still stands strong. As I was saying, yeah, you could really get detached of your artist self. Not because I wanted to. Because it just happened. Mostly because I let that happen . Not sure if I should tell the story on how I got fucked these entire years, all because if I start to talk I would put spotlight on people who don’t deserve it in the first place. But oh well. I can give you some advice, maybe save a life from despair. I wish someone did.

1- Don’t you EVER give your art for free. Carelessly.


I learned the hard way. And this is the first and golden rule. You need to have a big fucking good reason for you to give something that requires a lot of you to someone. Yeah, you read that right. In my case, my art is really a part of me basically. Before I started to gain notoriety and money, I pretty much used my art for comfort, for fun and it was my escapism for oh so long. It’s very very intimate. So don’t go out there giving away part of who you are. Unless it’s for money. Profit from it at least. If not, that’s half way on you getting detached to yourself. And if you get detached, you can still create but you won’t ever be able to relate to your own art. Or even connected to your creativity’s core. Believe me, you dont want that. Unless you are using only your craft for money. A marketeer, for example. 

But... if you still entitled to give your art away to someone... you should really need to ask yourself why you’re  doing that:
 - Exposure? You can do that all by yourself. 
- Interesting projects? Maybe, but again, you can do that by yourself and there will be a lot more folks who will be willing to PAY YOU,and come on, you are an artist, you'd think you wouldn't come with interesting projects as well? 
- Feelings? Is it? It has to be.

2 -Don’t you ever sell yourself less that you are really worth.

3- if you want to pursue an art career, prepare to defend it fiercely like your life depends on. Actually it really does depend on. Most people won’t understand, but hey in the end it’s on you and people will start to disrespect, because you don’t respect yourself.


4- don’t lose focus on what you really want, whatever life throws a you.


There's a lot more though. But I'm tired already. Not just because I'm lazy, but I'm tired to relive the past and my mistakes.

I did art for survival back then by putting low prices in order to barely survive but those prices doesn't and never defined me.

My art doesn't cost less than my self worth and respect. 
My art is not supposed to give it freely and for people who didn't deserve.
My art is not supposed to leave it unaccredited by reckless people who doesn't have any consideration whatsoever.

My art suffered. I suffered. And now I have to amend by putting my art rightfully on its place again.

And I'm going to proove why it deserves a lot more consideration and respect.


Friday, September 18, 2015

Japanese Curry Rice

Hello.


This blog still lives. I'm just too lazy for my own good.

That's it. A reminder. Damn, I'm already tired.


Until the next productive and interesting entry! :D

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Stew of Shame with some fries of Blame and with Slackery for Dessert

HI!

omg! it lives! this blog still lives modafocas! An entire year without saying a thing! some record of mine! Oh you guys didn't know? I entered on a challenge called " How long will I not touch my blog", and I think I suceeded! :D

OK, enough. I know, I know.... damn... 2014! Where was I? Roaring, according to my last entry...

I did roar, but not on this blog, shamelessly. After an epic last entry, I shoulda...woulda...coulda... BAH.

2014 was a transition year, and a good one and did compensate the last one, I will highlight some stuff (I'll try D: )

- I did many more illustrations than I usually do in a year.
- I've finally moved out from my parents house FOR GOOD. 
- I started freelancing for realsies. 
- I got into another game studio.
- I fuckin' have a house of my own. FUCKING FINALLY.
- I've made many more new fans and friends.
- Everyone now wants a piece of me. 


Some remarkable 2014 marks that still warm my heart:



At the beginning of this year, I entered a challenge called "Disney Pin-up girls" in the ImagineFX Forum. I entered just for fun since it wasn't an official challenge they used to make, and because of the idea of having Rapunzel hanging somewhere without clothes.
I have won the challenge (winning streak :P). The ImagineFX magazine publisher somehow noticed my work and he wanted to publish it in the magazine... You know, the digital art magazine that every professional artist purchases (well, almost every artist, professional and amateur like me). THEY INVITED ME TO PUBLISH MY WORK ON THEIR MAGAZINE. It's not like I asked them to display my portfolio there ( they often display some portfolios in the magazine). I also got invited to display it though :P but I felt that my portfolio wasn't strong enough, so I declined... I DECLINED THEIR INVITATION. Maybe some day, who knows ;_; It was very memorable for me. This was one of the reason why I've started freelancing officially.

Here's some 2014 stuff:



















 Believe me, I did sooooooo much more.  I just can't upload it yet because of some copyright issues.

Oh and I've moved out from my parents' home, for real ( not like the other times), I've started to live in the capital. Long story short, I've started on a freelance job that required me to live in Lisbon. So yeah... the rest is history ( I was supposed to talk about how I started to live in Lisbon, but things got out of hand in the beginning and I prefer not to ruin my beautiful art blog with sad and angry stuff).

And I also started working on a game studio! YAAAAAAAAAAY--

NO. DON'T BE HAPPY. DO NOT CELEBRATE FOR ME. It's the worst place I've ever worked. EVER. And believe me, I've worked in many places. BUT THAT... picture this... that job makes me think that prostituition maybe isn't bad at all. And I abhorr prostituition. The only positive thing that I could get off that, is that I was able to make some friendships and new fans, and that led me to more freelance jobs. At least there's that... 

My goal in 2015 is to have a kickass portfolio. So the transition year of 2014 still goes on in 2015. I need to get better. I'm still aiming for Wizards of the Coast. And I swear that I will continue working until I get ONE illustration of mine on Magic the Gathering cards.

One of the reasons I stopped blogging is because I activated my facebook account again. Yeah... Facebook. The best tool for procrastination alright. I wanted to deactivate it again, but I won't do it because I follow so many artists that I admire... Besides that, I really don't have any reason at all to have such toxic social media like Facebook.

So many things happened in 2014... I did my best to resume the entire year. It could have been avoided if I didn't slack around last year so... yeah:







Cheers!




Monday, January 6, 2014

Champagne and Raisins

MERRY "BELATED" CHRISTMAS!

HAPPY "BELATED" NEW YEAR!

so busy... I focused the last month on my drivers license, and I couldn't think of anything else. But oh well... I've started great this year at last, I managed to get my driver's license. FINALLY! Since last year! grr The driving School process was way too slow,  even for me that I managed to pass both exams at first. Well, at least I finally have the driving license which gives me the freedom to go anywhere else whenever I feel like, and go for a ride to ride off the stress and stuff. Which I have a lot.

I've made some studies last month:










Insisted on Landscapes as usual.

Photo references:


Daily Speed paint 30 minutes:








Selfies 1hour each:



Speed paint of Little sister ( the only thing to hold her still was to put Spirited Away movie lol):




I decided to make this post longer since it's my first this year and it has to be memorable. Not just because it's the first but also because I need to resolve my goals for this year. Last year (2013) was the shittiest year I ever had, honestly speaking. For those who have followed this blog, you can tell. Since my nervous breakdown at the beginning of this year, (come to think about it, my health was a real mess last year lol), tendinitis on my left arm, making one of the hardest decisions about not proceeding with college, and trying to give my all to my portfolio... well, SHIT. 2013 was a crap year.

2014 HAS TO BE a great year. To make up for the last one. I will demand myself to make it so. I took my driver's license on the 3rd January so I can foresee that it will be a good year. Even though some of my plans are not going along as I thought.

 Today I'm sad, because one of my main goals of this year won't be fulfilled. It was fundamental indeed, I need money to start my life but that won't happen so soon I'm afraid.

But I need to find another way, I really hope that the best of this year will come. And the positive energies will be in my favor, and grant me the life that I desired a long ago and I deserve. I suffered a lot, I will continue if I have to, if it that's what it takes. And believe it or not but whenever I feel down I discovered early this year that Katy Perry surprinsingly has one song who can get me super motivated and the feeling that I can move mountains stupidily enough because i'm not that a fan of mainstream commercial pop music nowadays but this song is really a kicker for me:




I really hope for the best for this year and I've made the first official Speed painting based on it:



...And you're gonna hear me ROAR.


Cheers.






















Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Beef Wellington

Hello there,

I've started my treatment for my left arm. It seems I got tendonitis on my shoulder, and now I'm slowly recovering it. I've made some studies, I had to take a break from major illustrations I had in mind... So I didn't do much since my last post but here goes:

traditional:















photo reference:






Screen capture from movies:

\
I just loved the Dark Knight trilogy, that's why.Not finished obviously.

 I loved "man of Steel". Personally I think its the best Superman movie ever made, I've seen every Superman movie and this is by far, the best.


 My favorite movie. "The Pianist ", and my most cherished scene.  I cried like a bitch because I'm a pussy that's why. And now I miss playing piano....I miss terribly... sigh.


each one took near 2 hours to execute.


selfies on the mirror:





Yeah I look always bored. In fact, I'm a boring person. the first went well, but the second I was fed up staring myself on the mirror for so long and my arm was in agony, so I pretty much rushed it. lol

and something something:





first one was with photo reference, a self-portrait from my own photo... I know I can't get enough of myself. the last one it's some doodle, free drawing and stuff.


that's all folks!